Tag Archive for: personal leadership

Fora da curva

Sucesso sem obsessão é possível? Bem, depende de como você define sucesso — portanto a resposta é que sim, é possível encontrar e viver a sua definição de sucesso sem obsessão. Agora, se estamos falando de atingir resultados fora da curva, que se destacam da maioria, que vão além da média, minha conclusão é que não. Não acredito que seja possível ser notável sem um investimento igualmente acima da média de tempo, foco e energia. Independentemente da área, até hoje não encontrei nenhum outlier que não tenha investido muito para conquistar seus resultados. Quem promete o contrário está mentindo. Não tem fórmula mágica. É uma mistura de suor, lágrimas e … risadas, porque dificilmente alguém consegue ir além da “média” se não estiver se divertindo e ganhando energia com o processo.

Eu sou apaixonado por esportes e por mexer o corpo, e o triatleta alemão Jan Frodeno é um cara que me chama a atenção. Jan foi medalhista de ouro no triatlo masculino nos Jogos Olímpicos de Verão de 2008 em Pequim. Venceu por três vezes o Campeonato Mundial Ironman, em 2015, 2016 e 2019, e duas vezes o Campeonato Mundial Ironman 70.3, em 2015 e 2018. Estabeleceu o recorde mundial para a longa distância em 2016, com o tempo de 7:35:39 horas (a média masculina deste esporte que é por definição brutal é de 13 horas). Em 2021, quebrou seu próprio recorde com um tempo de 07:27:53, estabelecendo um novo melhor mundial para o triatlo de longa distância. Quem vê o cara nas redes sociais parece que é fácil. Será mesmo?

Jan se aposentou do triatlo competitivo há pouco, mas continua vivendo com intensidade. Mergulhei na sua história para entender como a rotina de treinos e nutrição dele se comparava a outros atletas, porque quem olha de fora tem a impressão que sua vida é suave e linear, e às vezes atribuímos resultados extraordinários à sorte ou à genética (que não deixa de ser sorte). Não é o caso de Jan, e acho que não é o caso de ninguém que é foda no que faz. Triatletas profissionais treinam em média 30 horas por semana, Jan chega a treinar 45. Acompanhando um vídeo que mostra sua rotina, o clássico “day in the life”, me impressionou que seu dia começa às 5.30am na piscina, segue para uma corrida de 10Km ao ar livre, 65Km de bike pela estrada, treino de bike e fortalecimento indoor e, para finalizar o dia, treino de tiro de corrida ao anoitecer. Veja o que ele fala: “enquanto meus concorrentes estão sentados na mesa de jantar comendo, o fim do dia é meu horário favorito de treinar. Eu sei que estou me martelando, dando o meu melhor, indo até o limite”. Não é genética, não é sorte; é processo, disciplina, consistência, suor. É obsessão. A versão light desta mensagem, conforme dizemos na Faria Lima, é o clássico “there’s no free lunch“, ou “não existe almoço grátis”.

Jan Frodeno takes career-defining win at PTO US Open - Triathlon Magazine Canada
Jan Frodeno em uma de suas últimas provas como triatleta profissional no PTO US Open em 2023

Para nós, mortais que mesmo que com muita vontade não poderíamos treinar 40 horas por semana porque treino não paga boletos, não é diferente. O desafio é encontrar o que te energiza de verdade para então dedicar as horas, disciplina e foco necessários para construir histórias e resultados excepcionais. Esqueça a narrativa de seguir sua paixão: as paixões mudam com a maturidade e à medida que vivemos e aprendemos, mas nossas fontes de energia tendem a se manter bem mais constantes. A maioria segue o status quo, percorrendo rotas já batidas daquilo que é considerado sucesso pela massa. Ao seguir aquilo que não conversa de verdade com o que lhe gera energia, as pessoas se conformam em navegar na mediocridade e param de questionar e buscar. A realidade é que quando entregar além da média se torna um fardo a conta não fecha; mesmo com insistência, não será um caminho sustentável. É a fonte do burnout e outras mazelas. Para a conta fechar, é preciso que o suor, e as vezes até as lágrimas, seja um combustível interno que deixa o motor mais forte e melhor. É preciso amar o processo — ou a jornada, como eu gosto de chamar.

E o equilíbrio entre vida pessoal e profissional? Acho difícil ter uma vida consistentemente equilibrada. Às vezes o pêndulo pesa para o profissional, especialmente em momentos de grandes entregas e quando abraçamos projetos novos; em outros momentos, é necessário que dediquemos mais tempo ao pessoal. Nunca é 50:50. Obsessão e grandes entregas estão também relacionadas a foco, e não somente a horas investidas. Saber dizer não, eliminar os ruídos, cortar aquilo que não conversa com a história que está sendo escrita é prerrogativa para uma vida rica, com entregas profissionais fora da curva e a construção de uma família. Por isso é importante saber: que história está sendo criada? Em business, chamamos isso de estratégia, mas a pergunta é relevante a tudo e a todos.

Que história você está construindo?

Alex

É tão simples: gaste menos do que você ganha. Invista com inteligência. Evite pessoas tóxicas e atividades tóxicas. Tente continuar aprendendo durante toda a sua vida. E pratique muita gratificação adiada. Se você fizer todas essas coisas, é quase certo que terá sucesso. E se não fizer, você vai precisar de muita sorte. E você não quer precisar de muita sorte. Você quer entrar em um jogo onde é muito provável que você ganhe sem precisar de sorte incomum.

Charlie Munger

Get out of your comfort zone before you get kicked out of it!

It’s a fact, our primitive brain seeks stability, predictability, and minimal energy expenditure to keep it safe, nourished, and alive. Interestingly, this same organ sometimes gives a nudge and provokes us to leave the place, to unveil the unknown, to question this much sought after stability and — oops! — including risking it in pursuit of something greater. The human mind is indeed confused, and luckily there is philosophy, therapy, meditation, running, surfing, beer, wine and friendly shoulders to alleviate our permanent conflicts. Even so, one cannot ignore the fact that whether or not the desired stability is increasingly far from the vast majority of mortals, especially us here in this Tupiniquim land in this year of 2015.

In the corporate world, hierarchical layers are being cut from all sides, accumulation of responsibilities, increasingly distant goals and the growing insecurity that your chair can rotate. In the creative and entrepreneurial universe, professionals of all ages seek to launch the next blockbuster application, create the new and most efficient productivity tool and find the long-awaited autonomy and financial independence — attitudes that we personally admire, but inserted in a context with demand exponential investment and limited capital availability. On the educational agenda, there are criticisms and provocations of changes communicated daily, coming from researchers, specialists and, notably, from civil society itself. In the vast majority, they are initiatives that aspire to take us to a scenario closer to true learning, which is very good. Even so, it only reinforces the feeling that the world and the way we live is being disrupted, having its structures dramatically shaken. Even the dreamed world of public tenders, the emblem of the search for stability and with more and more aspirants, samba to unpredictable rhythms masterfully led by tight public accounts and macroeconomic instability.

Thus, the question arises: what can be done to better navigate this galaxy of uncertainties and ambiguities? How not to despair with the expectation that we can, at any moment, be kicked far from our comfort zone?

The proactive path is to deliberately leave that comfort zone, consciously deciding and against the will of that primitive brain to provoke and challenge it. Over time, these exercises result in stronger, more defined muscles, and a body and mind ready to fight and even have fun when that kick comes. After all, a kick hurts much less in an athlete’s body, muscular and well trained, than in a skinny and sedentary body.

But, and how to take the first step out of the bubble that constitutes our routine? We risk here some logical ideas and concrete actions, which have been tested and proven in our past experiences, as managers or coaches.

1. Recognize where you are today: What industry, role, and geography do you find yourself in? What is your career progression to date and the prospect of growth in your current job? In what areas, competitors and industries do you see yourself adding value and delivering impact — or in other words, what skills from your current job can you easily apply in other contexts? Before starting any challenging sport, it is important to have a medical evaluation in order to diagnose your current physical condition and design a healthy and robust training plan. With your career, it works the same way: an honest and concrete diagnosis, based on facts of where you are today is a fundamental step to guarantee the solidity of your future roadmap.

2. Making an analogy to the financial investment strategy, diversify your portfolio of professional skills: an investor reduces his risk by investing in a varied portfolio of companies (read geography and sector). So, when one goes wrong, there’s probably another one to balance the equation. Why not do the same with your skills? It is important to know how to navigate and communicate with different functional areas (marketing, finance, operations, HR), to develop skills that allow you to easily be relocated to other areas and geographies and feel ready to quickly make things happen beyond your own bubble.

3. Challenge yourself in your spare time: But life is not just work and everything we do outside of it impacts our perception of it. The people we interact with and the activities that occupy our time away from the office influence how we see ourselves as individuals and professionals. Thus, it is worth reflecting on how we spend, or invest, our spare time: (1) sleeping, (2) in front of the TV, (3) exploring a book, a new concept, and provoking the mind to learn something different, (4 ) playing or experiencing a physically challenging sport, (5) traveling and exploring unknown territories that challenge our perception of how the world works and what is right and wrong? The list is long, and the important thing is to mix rest and challenges, aware that the brain is plastic and, if we do our part, new synapses will continue to happen.

4. Discover and explore personal passions (which may eventually turn into professional ones): It’s not easy to know what our true passions are. It is not an intellectual, rational process; on the contrary, it is something organic, practical, that happens as we explore and experience possibilities. Example: I (Alex) only discovered that running was a passion after 3 months of continuous practice 3 times a week. Once the first phase of euphoria, fatigue and adaptation had been overcome, I could see after 3 months how much my life had improved due to the exercise. Likewise, release curiosity and explore new sources of energy: crafts, volunteering, extreme sports, nature walks,
conscious eating, meditation, music, independent travel through inhospitable and little-explored places. Dedicate time and energy to exploring dormant interests and needs, opening up new avenues of possibility.

5. Experience transition possibilities and greater learning: Taking a broader step, why not invest in more radical transformations, such as preparing for a change in sector or even country? Here, the investment of time, energy and money is much greater, and therefore decisions must be weighed according to your financial and family situation. We are talking about Masters, MBAs or PhDs abroad, in top schools, which can open up previously unimaginable personal and professional possibilities. Without having to go that far and with a much more modest investment, professionals interested in changing the world through social entrepreneurship have the possibility of learning in practice by engaging with institutions that propose innovative learning models. Why not look for solutions to social challenges and problems without making radical career changes, experimenting and learning little by little? Graduate programs with this purpose, for example, can function as a career transition platform and a bridge to a world with potentially different and revealing people, values and definitions of success.

By recognizing that your professional value is not just limited to a position in sector X at company Y, possibilities increase, as well as your (emotional) dependence on what is written on your badge decreases. Many of the professionals who seek the services of a career coach only see a linear evolution for their careers. For example, a finance analyst in the consumer goods industry can see only one evolution to a management in the same area and sector. The secret lies in the intersection of skills, experiences, passions and talents, and when people can connect these dots, they unlock a universe of possibilities.

Finally, everything that challenges us and forces us to rethink the world and our role in it results in strengthening our ability to reinvent ourselves in times of crisis and face unexpected situations. It results in greater resilience, self-knowledge and self-leadership, fundamental elements of professionals who bring a positive impact to the world and, not least, live an integrated personal and professional life, full of meaning and happiness.

Article originally written by Alex Anton and Rajesh Rani, published in Harvard Business Review Brasil in June 2015.

Want to make a difference? Don’t be afraid of losing your job

Economic crisis. Instability. Insecurity. Fear.

These are just some of the key words we’ve heard (and felt) in recent times. Naturally, being exposed to all of this reflects the fear of losing your job. It’s a natural fear. However, science knows that fear blocks risk, and in times of crisis perhaps what you most need to do is take risks: by being brutally honest with others and yourself about past decisions and their impact on the present and future; testing new ways to sell, relate or perform everyday tasks; and saying no to what is pleasurable but irrelevant.

The unemployment rate in Brazil stood at 11.2% in the quarter ended in May this year, the highest result in the historical series started in March 2012, according to the National Household Sample Survey (Pnad). Naturally, the fear of Brazilians of losing their jobs accompanies the numbers. In December 2015, this fear had grown by 36.8% compared to 2014, according to a survey by CNI (National Confederation of Industry). The phenomenon is not exclusive to Brazil. A survey published in January 2016 and conducted by the agency ICM Unlimited with 9,000 workers (16 to 25 years old) from countries such as Australia, South Africa, the United States, Brazil and also from Europe shows that 50% of these young people believe that their training it did not prepare them for the job market, which is reflected in the fear of stopping on the street.

Eager to explore this theme, we conducted a study on success, fears and values with approximately 200 people, mostly between 25 and 35 years old from the Southeast region of Brazil between June and July of this year. Among other concerns such as health and family problems, 46% of respondents associated their greatest fears with their professional life. In response to the question “What are you most afraid of?”, 25% associated it with stagnation and professional failure, 16% with instability or financial failure, and 5% directly mentioned unemployment. In contrast, 42% of respondents demonstrated a negative degree of career satisfaction (on a scale of 1 to 6, up to 3 points). Of this portion of dissatisfied people, 26% linked their fears to professional failure, 18% to financial issues and 4% to being unemployed. This same group of people stated that, if they were not afraid, they would take more risks such as traveling or leaving the country (32%), would change careers or open their own business (28%) and would hesitate less in their decisions and actions in general ( 22%). Basically, those most dissatisfied with their careers are the same ones who are most afraid of losing the career they don’t like. Curious, isn’t it?

Fear is part of the human essence and guarantees our survival in risky situations. It allows you to analyze scenarios and assess consequences, but it must be managed consciously. Practicing self-awareness and understanding our real fears is the starting point for identifying situations in which fear inhibits our actions at times when we should be guided by caution — fear is a primitive and often irrational response, while caution is rational and logical . By focusing our perceptions and energy on what we don’t want, we end up running away from our real essence and our dreams and enter a vicious cycle of failures.

It’s easy to criticize. But the fear of success is a problem that affects many people. In a study published in February of this year in the journal Frontiers in Psychology, Neureiter and Traut-Mattausch address the Impostor Syndrome, defined as the state of perceived intellectual and professional disability, despite evidence to the contrary. This condition affects approximately 70% of people at some point in their lives and is related to fear of failure and fear of success, as well as low self-esteem. The study points out that these feelings are proven to reduce career planning, ambition and motivation to lead.

Although a biological process, fear is not an insurmountable phenomenon. Our brain is in continuous evolution due to the experiences we live and, therefore, it is possible to reconfigure it (cerebral neuroplasticity phenomenon). This requires knowing your strengths and using them to gain self-confidence as your exposure to what you fear grows. The greater the exposure to conflicting and challenging situations, the easier it will be to face and overcome anxieties. The psychological foundation is in exposure therapy: exposing yourself gradually and repeatedly and, with a rational perspective, getting out of mental exercises like “oh if I had…” and actually living new experiences in a practical and visceral way. Afraid to fail? To change? From stepping out of the comfort zone? Not taking initiatives and defending yourself with shallow arguments is always the easiest way. However, if you don’t risk it, you certainly won’t know your limits and you won’t experience transformative experiences. Staying conformed and choosing to remain in “standby” will only make you stop embracing new opportunities and watch time pass without any initiative. Is this really your profile and how do you expect to trace your trajectory?

To answer this question, we suggest a simple and useful diagnostic exercise. Answer the questions: In the past year, how many times did I:

(1) Did I accept a wrong answer or poor work from my team and stay quiet so as not to “create a fuss”?

(2) Did I fail to give honest feedback to my boss and colleagues because I feared their reactions?

(3) Did I not position myself firmly and convincingly in a debate in which I dominated the subject in order to save energy and not confront?

(4) Was I not interested and determined to embrace a new project in the company for fear of failing and not delivering?

Difficult and uncertain times are great opportunities to review where we are coming from, where (in fact) we are and where we want to go. Of course, it’s not easy and help from colleagues and professional coaches can be welcome.

People who make a difference are dreamers and visionaries, but above all, courageous. Tracing a unique and non-linear trajectory in which we reach our maximum potential implies taking risks and escaping mediocrity. Don’t reduce your dreams out of fear. The failure of extremely daring goals is even more enriching than the success of mediocre dreams. Mistakes and failures are part of the learning process and a successful career. Change your mindset, have positive attitudes, work hard and take risks.

My personal narrative, the longer format

Backpacking in Vang Vieng, Laos, 2008

This writing is an exercize in connecting the dots, which we should all do from time to time. It’s a journey through memory lane as well as a recollection of moments registered through journalling, which I have been practicing for more than 20 years (everybody should do it too, it’s like doing therapy for free).

As a Brazilian, being born in a working-class family basically means that you are fated to have your life pre-designed. Typically, you follow the steps of your parents, beginning with standard education, heavy pressure to get into a public university, some odd jobs to raise all the pocket money possible and, after graduation, facing the usual battle to get the first job. Once you have made it, you are supposed to consider yourself happy, get married, and enjoy life playing soccer and drinking beer with your best friends. That was all, my mom had thought, until early 2003 when I took the initiative to apply for a traineeship program in Potsdam, Germany. Enthusiastically and doubtful, I put all my efforts into that application. Two months had passed, and the German-stamped envelope finally arrived; it was a “yes”, and that was the beginning of a series of events that led me to found HIKE today.

Following that amazingly surprising outcome, many beer cans were opened, numerous cheers celebrated, smiles, good laughing, and some tears at my hometown’s airport. Suddenly I was hit with different feelings, assorted faces, and an odd language; I had arrived in Berlin. Back then I hardly spoke any English, and my German was non-existent. Now I realize how pretentious I was in expecting that a place would be exactly as my mind had projected. From Berlin’s airport to Potsdam’s train station, I realized that some feelings are simply so profound that they belong only to the ones who’ve been through them, and alone, during those 65 minutes, I experienced scents, temperatures and emotions that would seem silly if written here. They were mine, and if translated into one word, that would be “discovery”.

Since then, my journey has been illustrated with significant independent-driven discoveries. It hasn’t always been easy or romantic, but by walking off the beaten path I could experiment things that otherwise would never have come across my way. Essentially, in my past 20 years I have witnessed that it’s out of your comfort zone that you truly become aware of your inner soul, beliefs, fears, dreams, passions, prejudices, and everything related to self-awareness. I have been fortunate to allow myself the freedom to explore the beauty of self-awareness; consequently, I have realized that I want to drive my existence towards something meaningful and tangible.

I have always been curious and passionate about designing products and services that have the power to add real value to people’s lives by offering solutions to their physiological and psychological needs. Consequently, today I am glad to introduce myself professionally as a scientist, turned entrepreneur, investor, coach, mentor; above all, I am and have always been a strong people-person. As you can see through my Linkedin, I have been fortunate to work with world class people and companies, having excelled on the startup and scale up world, where I deeply connect with the culture of pragmatism, dynamism and purpose-driven leadership. Despite all the good-looking brands on my CV, these are external metrics; on the other hand, the experiences I had through all the amazing people I’ve met are all internal and there’s no dollar sign I can put on them. I feel grateful and privileged for the journey so far.

Through the Jungfrau mountains in Switzerland, 2009

I learned that I thrive when working with people who are curious, open-minded and ambitious on their own terms; through authentic conversations, I feel the power and joy of inspiring and getting others to reach their potential. This is my calling and what I want to deploy, develop and grow at HIKE.

I am always driven to walk the talk, and I love talking to strangers. I am not afraid of initiating new ventures and am passionate about entering new territories. Through my own initiative, I have lived and worked in Germany, UK, Canada, Switzerland, USA, China, and Malaysia. I truly embrace diversity and I like to think I was born to be a citizen of the world. As a good citizen, I have independently — and with very limited resources — explored more than 60 countries. I am also a father of two, a marathon runner, surfer, and a lover of the world and all its nuances.

With the iconic Jack Welch, in Harvard Business School, 2012

I truly believe that authentic leadership — learned through intense and multiple experiences driven by your own initiative and with the support of strong communities — is the key to making this world a more tolerant, accessible, real, and possible place. I work to empower and cultivate more of such leaders.

Mindfulness for leadership, focus and creativity

According to Wikipedia, mindfulness, translates as full attention, alert mind or full awareness. If we are strict about the origin of the word, mindfulness means the essence of the Vipassana measurement stream. Whereas other types of Buddhist measurement aim to empty the mind of any conscious reasoning or direct attention to a single image or idea, Vipassana practitioners seek to uncritically gain awareness of all thoughts and emotions experienced in the moment.

Attention: this rich and delicate philosophy cannot be explained in detail in just a few lines. The objective here is just to expose the concept to those who are interested in the subject or have heard about it but do not know what mindfulness means in practice. Personally, I believe that the frequent practice of Vipassana meditation can bring more focus, calm and energy to the mind and body. Specifically, Vipassana followers believe that our minds are constantly busy re-processing the past or anticipating the future, allowing little time and energy to truly live in the present. Theory comes to practice through simple exercises that can be practiced by anyone, anywhere. The principle is to focus on the breath, for example, and indirectly increase awareness of what goes through the mind, always in a non-critical and detached way.

Although a monastic life dedicated exclusively to the contemplation of the moment is light years away from the world most of us live in – that is to say the rush, the hustle, the emails, the pressure (external and internal) – there is a growing interest in how the principles of this practice can be applied to our lives in a pragmatic and realistic way. American psychologist and professor Ellen Langer has been studying mindfulness for a number of years, and her main theory is that practice plays an important role in the learning process. For her, meditating often increases her ability to see the world through constantly new angles. New angles, of course, require curiosity and commitment, as well as letting go of past concepts.

Letting go of old ideas, she warns, is especially difficult because possibly these “ideas” are already part of our DNA and we are not aware of them. With greater awareness of what we know and what we don’t know, we become more open and creative to new solutions.

Meditation & Leadership

In March of 2013, an important American newspaper dedicated a page to this topic: what is the interface between mindfulness and leadership? Who responded was Bill George, professor at Harvard Business School, former CEO of a billion-dollar company, and strong advocate of a productive, creative and authentic lifestyle. Bill argues that the subject is so much in evidence that at the last World Economic Forum in Davos the most attended lecture was given by the Buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard. The latter, French and scientist with a doctorate in the West, is a scientific adviser to the Dalai Lama and author of the book Art of Meditating.

What is causing this dramatic shift in the way we think about what it takes to be an effective leader today? Well, it starts with the changes taking place in the world. We live in an era where globalization and advancing technological change create volatility, uncertainty, chaos and ambiguity. This impact grows exponentially through a job market in constant transformation and the new world where communication is present 24 hours a day. Seven days a week.

See how interesting: companies like Google, General Mills, Genentech, Target and Cargill, for example, have developed training programs for their employees focusing on mindfulness and leadership. The expected (and achieved) benefits are summarized in more creative, focused and determined managers. The correct word is resilience, but other adjectives help color the impact of meditation practice.

Following Professor George, practicing meditation for 20 minutes a day (I practice 10 and I believe it already has an effect) is essential to increase your effectiveness and sense of well-being. He has been doing it since 1975, and the result can be measured through his resume.

“Meditation allows me to forget about unimportant things and focus clearly on the important matters. My most creative ideas come from meditation. Also, meditation improves my energy level and allows me to have more compassion for others”, says Bill.

You see, it’s not just sitting down for 10-20 minutes a day, every day, that brings you the benefit of mindfulness. Praying regularly, keeping a journal, interesting and intimate discussions with people close to you, and solitary exercises such as running, walking, or swimming make us live in the present. The most important thing is to have a form of introspective practice that allows you to calm your mind and focus on what really matters.

Advancing towards the “what can I do?”, is the suggestion, scientifically proven, to practice meditation for 10 minutes daily. The important thing is to have discipline and follow the plan regardless of the context. Establish your routine as you see fit. Personally, it works well in the morning, after showering and before breakfast. Having a dedicated chair or cushion for practice also helps. And for beginners, guided meditation is an excellent tool to help “tame” the mind.

Article originally written in December 2013

Resilience: what, why and how

“More than education, more than experience, more than training, an individual’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who falls along the way. That’s true for cancer patients, it’s true for Olympic athletes, and it’s true for executives and entrepreneurs in the boardroom,” states Dean Becker in a 2002 Harvard Business Review article.

Resilience, therefore, is the ability to control your response to physically or mentally stressful situations. Science shows that the more resilient the individual is the further he will go in his personal and professional life. It makes sense. Success is the reflection of countless falls and defeats that were seen as opportunities for learning and growth.

In my experience living with and working with extremely talented individuals – at Harvard, McKinsey, as an investor and around the world – it is clear that the most interesting are those who have gone through adversity, sometimes heavy, and had the strength to rise again even greater. They have a contagious inner energy, empathy and humanity while demonstrating strength and unerring determination. Example? Liz Kwo, my colleague and co-coach in the program that we concluded in 2013 in Shanghai through Fullbridge: born in Taipei to a poor single mother, she illegally immigrated to the United States with her mother and sister when she was still a baby. In San Francisco, where they arrived by ship, they lived in a garage while their mother sweated in simple jobs to bring food “home”. She had everything to go wrong in life, but today her walls illustrate diplomas from Stanford, Harvard Medical School and Harvard Business School, simply the best educational institutions in the world. How? Because she knew that her only chance would be through education and merit, which she demonstrated by always being the most engaged, curious and determined student. Listening to her talk it is clear that her journey was not easy or romantic, but she says

“every time I felt like a loser, someone marked for bankruptcy, living in poverty and being a victim of an unfair and cruel world I closed my eyes and I remembered that my mother’s effort had to be worth it, and then I released the beast inside of me”.

It’s inspiring to hear that from her, even more so because her words come without pain or rancor; she tells her story with pride, softness, humanity illustrated with vulnerability and determination to keep going.

Clearly, the resilient individual is not the one who avoids stress in any and all forms, but the one who learns how to manage it and turn it into productive energy. The resilient person is likely to bend, but not break, when faced with adversity, trauma, tragedy, and threats. She is, most of the time, active and not passive in relation to what happens around her and in her life, always believing that she is the author of her present and future, and not a victim of her past.

Well, fortunately, many of us have not gone through dramatically impacting situations that shake our values and make us question our mission in the world, which is often heard from extremely resilient people (have you ever heard the story of someone who survived a serious accident or illness? ). So what if your life is comfortable and relatively linear? Scientists Steven Southwick and Dennis Charney of the Yale University School of Medicine recommend 4 scientifically proven strategies to boost your resilience:

Work with your physique: Physiologically, moderate physical activity promotes the release of endorphins and the neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin, which reduce symptoms of depression and improve mood. An animal experiment has shown that frequent running decreases various phobias and increases courage in exploring new environments. The recommendation is one hour and 15 minutes per week of intense aerobic activity such as running and swimming, or two hours and 30 minutes of moderate activity such as walking, for example.

Embrace Challenges and Step Out of Your Comfort Zone: Taking a step beyond what you normally would, whether on vacation, on the weekend, or at work, stretches your comfort zone and potentially increases your security. There are no limits and everyone knows what that means for them, but it can be overcoming a fear, making a presentation in a new language, exploring another country with few resources and infrastructure, or starting to say no instead of always molding yourself to please others.

Meditate, and develop a positive view of the world: Meditating often can bring you clarity, focus, and make it easier to prioritize where to invest your energy. Meditating connects you with the present, avoiding regrets about the past and excessive worries about the future. This is proven to reduce stress and allow you greater control over your life and decisions, making you a more confident and determined person.

Friends and your relationships: Finally, the last tactic for increasing resilience encourages you to spend more time with people with whom you show mutual acceptance, respect, and admiration. It only works, however, if you’re really connected to that person and can count on them for advice, tips, or just a shoulder to lean on. It helps if your network is filled with individuals who are examples of resilience in person, as you will have role models to observe and follow. Mimicking behaviors and practices that make others stronger can also be of high value. For example, when you are discouraged and ready to give up, remember that there is a “beast” inside each of us, as my colleague Liz would say.

Finally, writing your story with the knowledge that you are the author and protagonist, that you decide to spend more time celebrating small victories than lamenting how the world is unfair to you, increases your motivation, determination, productivity and, ultimately, happiness. That’s why the most competitive universities and companies in the world expect to hear stories of overcoming and resilience in their selection processes. Given all this, I ask you, the reader, as well as myself: what’s next?

Article originally written in Sept 2013